Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I supernannyed him into submission
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
