You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
