I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
