I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
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