i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
