Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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