i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
nutella sex= disaster
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
