what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
