used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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