I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
