i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize