Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
