Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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