I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
