it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
