You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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