I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
