So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
