i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize