She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm just crazy horny about you
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
