I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
