I hate your face
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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