He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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