am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
