i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize