i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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