She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
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