he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Two words: blizzard sex
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Come on in and take your pants off
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