Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I am midnight drunk by noon
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
She just used a chaser for red wine.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
