THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
