Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
