Having a random hookup so left but love u
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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