I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
