I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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