So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
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