I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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