If i come over, it means nothing
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
