Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
