You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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