last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize