If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
