Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
