Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
