party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
