Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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