Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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