my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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