And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
