And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
