toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
