You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
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